WHY?

It's been a while
9 years have passed
and I'm already tired
walking for miles
slow enough to lose myself
and fast enough to fall
taking over thoughts
already hid already ran
still there's nowhere to go
nothing make sense
under in a black hole
why a woman would cause so much pain to a boy?
why would she never fill this void
been empty since it was born
that rotten thing called heart,I'm done
few memories where i'd be lost
only good things remain
the rest sore
waiting the day it won't
the wait can be so long
down the streets
the sky is so bright
I look up high
have asked a thousand times
why?
is it not better to be happy and all?
I could bring it all
instead it seems so far
why do I feel so bad?
everytime it feels harder to try
to stand up
I dont know why
why do I feel this need?
I need a guide
to take me home
to give me the so called average life
take me with you
and bring me back
to a better time
I feel so ready
I've done my part
I am so sorry
I let it back
I can't be late for this
please I don't want
say It's my time
I've done it all
been taken down to the floor
been lifted up high above
one lasted more than the other
one hurt me more
I'm not a victim
I've caused it all
they'll blame it all on me
they'll spit their best words to me
but I'll be long gone
I need to earn my sleep
a dream so good and long
They'll say I gave up so easy
They'll say I was wrong
They'll never understand why
I didn't want to go on
I need the peace I lost
the moment I was born
play my favourite songs
meet me in my thoughts
where I get so lost into
or at the limbo
there's nothing I can undo
what you didn't do back then
now you won't do
the moments I've caused pain
please remember none
life and I broke our bond
I'm gone
I'm done.

9:06PM